Random thoughts

Last week I dragged my poor boyfriend to see Bride Wars. He was one of two men in the entire theater. I felt for him but it was nice that he wanted to take me to the movie. It was a cute romantic comedy and I enjoyed it. One part made me cry. It was when Kate Hudson's character, Liv, was getting prepared to walk down the aisle and the father of Anne Hathaway's character, Emma, came to tell Liv how proud he was of her and how he wished his good friend's, Liv's parents were here with her on the special day. It brought a tear to my eye because I realized my parents would not be there when I get married.
They're not dead, we just don't speak, we're estranged. They don't like my boyfriend. He and my dad got into a verbal fight on Christmas 2007. It's just escalated from there. My siblings have gotten involved and made it ten times worse. It makes for interesting holidays.
Anyway back to the movie, I didn't expect to be moved so much by the movie, but it made me a little sad. But I knew that just like Liv, I could be strong and move forward with life. I think the saying goes, you can pick your friends but not your family.
Then the commercial that always gets me was the one for I think it is Lexus cars. The kid is all excited about getting a big wheel for Christmas and you see him cruising down the street and he is beside himself with joy. I used to remember as a little girl riding my big wheel with my cousin and my sister at my grandma's house. this happens to be the mother of my father, who decided to keep peace to not invite me to Christmas Eve for the second time in my life. The first time was back in 1999, because of another man I was dating. They didn't agree with his race. But my boyfriend currently is the same race as me, she probably didn't want to rock the boat because of my dad. I think she felt bad when I called her to thank her for the gifts she mailed to both of us. I understand from her point, but it still hurt.
I think that's why in recent years I hate the holidays. We didn't put up a tree this year. We weren't even going to go to my mom's side of the family, if my grandpa had not called me very upset and crying. I did have my heart set on just staying home and it just being another day. We did make the most out of Christmas Eve and had one of our favorite foods. Nothing says Christmas Eve like HOOTERS! Now every time we eat Hooters, I'm reminded of the nice night my boyfriend tried to make for me on Christmas Eve.
It's funny that he is my family now. Him and our dogs. And all of my friends. I couldn't have asked for a better family now. My friends invite us over for their kids birthdays and their family celebrations. I feel included by them and no I can count on them for anything.
My boyfriend is my rock. He tells it like it is and stands up for me and challenges me. He has taken me places I would have never thought about going to or doing. We've been to numerous cities that I've only heard about. He rents me movies that he knows I would like and suprises me with them. He'll bring home flowers just because. It's the little things he does for me that make me love him more each day.
My dogs are like my babies. They love me unconditionally and make me feel like the best person in the world. They don't care what kind of car we drive. They just want to go for a ride in it. They don't care what kind of clothes I wear, they just like to lay on them when I am geting ready or when I undress. It doesn't matter where we live, just that I am there with them. That's unconditional love. I hope someday I am blessed to have a child that will think of me the same way.
That's the same way I used to see my parents growing up. I loved my parents because they were MY parents and not for any other reason. It didn't phase me that we lived in an apartment or that we never went on vacation. i was just happy to see them at my softball games and girl scout meetings and choir concerts. i would not have traded that for anything.
I can't wait to be the person waving at my child one day from the stands and know that miracle is my family....