Eggs

I sit here contemplating the rapid approach of my 32nd birthday. Sometimes I wonder how did I get here to this place? My dream growing up was to graduate college and be married by 24 with a kid on the way shortly thereafter...

It's all long gone. The college I can continue slowly plodding along. The marriage thing... Well, nowadays you don't necessarily have to be married to have a kid. The bf and I accepted about this time last year that we may need to do it all a little backwards. He was really good about it and was like okay whatever needs to be done.

Well, obviously because of a variety of health set backs, we haven't started. We're both okay with that but...

I sit here thinking about what I heard the other night while watching the "Real Housewives of New York City". Bethenny's friend was listening to her speak about wanting a baby and she said she understood her point especially because she said, "We are born with all the eggs we will ever have in our life."

What a cruel joke... Men can produce as much stuff as they need to but we're limited. It's almost like we have an expiration date. And as her friend on the Real Housewives pointed out, you want to use the most fresh eggs here... What am I doing making a cake???

Has PCOS made my expiration date come sooner than the master plan? Or maybe it has delayed it a bit by all those months of having no period. Or was it speed up by those months I had multiple periods or a month and a half long one quite frequently.

Or maybe I need to heed the bf's advice. He claims eggs have no expiration date. (I on the other hand still think this is up for discussion) He also says when he was little the eggs used to sit out all day at the grocery store outside of the cooler. I don't remember that part but maybe he is right.

I know I started my period at 10 or 11, all I can remember is my mom turning to me that day and saying she wondered when my time would come. I swear on the Holy Bible, that day I got it. Maybe I was cranky and she thought it was hormones that day, who knows. I kind of blame her for that. LOL!

But I can't think about my expiration date. I need to live life to the fullest. Whether that is rocking out at a Bon Jovi concert with friends or taking a road trip with my honey bunches of oats to see our favorite baseball team.

I need to enjoy the time I have with family and friends and with my little family I have with the bf and our animals. Like my aunt says there is always a way....

Soul Mate

You know how sometimes they say every person has a soul mate? Well, I have a few, not just one. Obviously, I think my bf is my soul mate. We complete each other's statements and can read each other's minds. But I have another one...
I met her, wow, it's been 18 years all ready, sitting behind her in Senorita Renfroe's Spanish class freshman year. The two of us probably couldn't read a lick in Spanish anymore, but we tried. She's one of those friends that you may wander in and out of each other's lives for awhile but like magnets, you always come back to one another. You always pick up where you left off, like you didn't skip a beat. It's funny I have another friend with the same first name that is the same way.
Well, I had been really down lately and kind of been out of touch and kind of explained what was going on and my friend told me to try this thing called blogging. I had heard of it, but I thought it was just what I needed. I needed to voice my thoughts, feelings, frustration, basically scream it out without screaming.
So, here are my thoughts, dreams, feelings, frustrations, hopes, etc.
It's like pulling a bandaid off a wound, it feels worse at first but then much better.