Family

Family isn't necessarily the parents or brothers and sisters you are born with. Sometimes they may be the friends that you have or your aunts and uncles or grandparents that you may not spend as much time with as you wish you could. You may not have even realized until later in life, just how much these people make up your family.
Whether they are there cheering you on or putting you in your place or holding your hand through a tough situation. Sometimes it's the partner you couple up with that is there with you through it all.
It took me awhile to understand all of these out of the norm people were my family. They are the ones that I want/need to surround myself with.
I've come to realize the negative people in my life are toxic, both emotionally and physically. Staying up late worrying if I spent enough on this one's gift or called X amount of times or made this many visits to someone was getting me nowhere but to a life of insomnia. They are the ones that talk about how much money they have or where they live or what kind of car they drive. But they forget where they came from. They forget it's a long way down from their high horse or pedestal. That fall is bone crushing.
It's funny because I've never been all about money or status. I mean it's nice when you have extra, but trust me I understand when you don't more often than not. LOL! The way I have always seen it, is that you can't take it with you when it's your time. I can hardly see St. Peter meeting you at the pearly gates and asking you how much was in your 401k!
My friends have never been all about money and my aunts and uncles understand you do what you can. My gifts always have thought behind them anyways. The best gifts are the ones that I really take the time to put together. One year for Christmas, I put together a basket of small gifts for her of her favorite things. It had chocolate covered cherries, books, movies and lotions. She looked less than thrilled when she opened it. My heart dropped. I thought I was the rock star for the day. Maybe if I had purchased a large gift certificate to her clothing store she frequented, it may have been better.
The funny thing is my parents recently became snobs. My siblings always had that brewing for years. There was years my parents barely scraped by or my mom was borrowing money to cover checks so they would not bounce. It never bothered me that we never went on a family vacation or went to Disney world. My mom always said the money to pay our tuition or pay for any extra curricular was the vacation money. I accepted it and never questioned it. I wasn't a scarred kid because I never met Mickey Mouse. There's more to life than that.
Someday I hope to have my own family one day with my boyfriend. I know we'll try our best to be a good example for our kid(s). Show them to treat everyone with the same patience, understanding, love and respect as they would want in return. We'll teach them that even the wealthiest person in the world can fall down. But it's all in how you pick yourself back up. They will learn from their mistakes and go forward.
My extended family has taught me that. How to hold my head up high. Even if I wasn't the daughter to get married first or even second, I'm still an okay person. I may not have had the first grandchild or chose to live with my boyfriend first before getting married, but I'm not any less of a person.
And neither is my bf. He may not be rolling in the dough, but every doctor's appointment I go to, he's there holding my hand. He's the one who rushes me to the ER whenever neccesary or when I just can't function, he'll do the dishes or laundry. I know it's tough on him. Most men would have left a LONG time ago, not him. He tells me every day that he loves me and shows me in the little ways.
I see how good he is to all my little cousins and my friends' children. He's quick to run to my aunt or uncles house whenever needed.
Those are the types of people I want to surround myself with. They are the ones who will wipe your tears or push you off the ledge when you don't have the courage to jump. They are the ones who may drift in and out of your life and when you catch a breather will call you and pick up where you left off.
They are not just friends to me, they are my family.